snowdarkred

Watching the news about Delicious leak and the subsequent backlash – and the backlash to the backlash, and the backlash to that – the only conclusion I can come to is that Yahoo is run by idiots.

The number of bookmarks being saved per hour? Down. The number of new users? Down. The number of people switching to other, admittedly poorer services? Way up. All because Yahoo can't do PR for shit. True, Delicious isn't exactly a straight up profit house, but it does, or did, have consumer loyalty. Think of how many fandom people have been using it for years? How many times it's handed to fandom-newbies as the holy grail of fic indexing? How many people thank what ever deity they believe in that it exists because it makes life easier?

Yahoo leaked the “sunset” news – or, someone else leaked it, and then some higher up on twitter threatened to fire them in a tweet, which also isn't the best way to handle things, 'cause dude, it's not going to endear you to the public – and then refused to comment about except for some serious bullshit statement that said absolutely nothing, while simultaneously suggesting the worst. And then they were surprised at the backlash from millions of users who use Delicious for everything from work to fandom. They released a statement that blamed the media for distributing false information, when it was their own ineptitude that was leading people to draw their own conclusions. And then they just sort of handwaved it by implying that, well, no one was using Delicious anyway, so what did it matter?

Do you know how long it took Wikipedia to update the Delicious article to say that Delicious was shutting down? Like, two hours.

I love my Delicious account. It's my baby. I spent two weeks going through and standardizing my tagging system, and making sure that everything has a clear label. When my computer crashed a few months back, I lost everything that had been saved – my pictures, about half of my fics, and a whole lot of other stuff that was important to me. But what wasn't lost?

My fic bookmarks. My articles. My fashion links. My research – the same research that I used to figure out what the hell is up with my sexuality, or lack thereof. All of these things may not be things, they may not be physical, they may just be data, but they're important. I've been in fandom for years. I love it. It's what I grew up with, it's what help me discover who I am, it's what got me to start writing and never stop. And Delicious is important to fandom. It's another way for us to share in the epic love fest that is free-form fandom – the rush of excitement, the surge of pleasure in discovering new things, the ease of access to things that we're interested in.

And Yahoo threatened that. Whether the site shuts down Delicious, sells it, or whatever, I know I won't be able to trust them again. I can't. They obviously can't even manage themselves – how can I expect them to manage a simple website?


PS. I would love it if LiveJournal bought Delicious. I think it would be a good fit, though I'm not sure how that would work.
PPS. My trip to see my family didn't work out -- I couldn't go because of weather stuff. :( I've been using the past few days to panic over Delicious and read lots of Glee fic. I just need a chance to turn my brain off, you know? I feel like I'm always on on on, and I just need to power down and relax. Which I can't really do, because my boss is an idiot who doesn't know how to write a simple schedule, and that when I say, I can't work on Christmas Eve, it means I can't work on Christmas Eve. He also has the hots for my step-sister, but I don't want to think about that because it's icky and he's a creeper.

and together we bake a layer cake

One day, I'm going to lose my shit and kill someone.

I'm sure you've all heard me rant at some point about my Shitty Childhood, though I add the same disclaimer every time – AKA, I know that there are definitely people out there who've had worse; I even know several of those people. I'm even friends with some of those people. But that doesn't mean that my childhood was fun or easy going or, goddammit, enjoyable. Fuck no.

I bring this up now because I just lost control of myself and got super pissed at my mom, and started crying because that's my response to being emotional, because of something that she said, which is still burning at me. Because, seriously, what the actual fuck!?!?

What happened: One of my good friends got a tattoo. Just a little one, just below her collarbone. It's her favorite line from her favorite song by her favorite band. And it has personal significance to her. And my mother and I have talked in the past about tattoos and the one my mom wants. So I showed her the pic of it (here) and my mom's response was...less than encouraging. Basically it was, 'Oh, look at what the freak girl did now, why is my daughter friends with her?'

My response: RAGE.

Con-chan has helped me through some seriously tough shit, shit that my mother refused to see and buried her head in the sand about because that was easier than seeing proof of how her husband's behavior fucked me over. Con-chan (aka, Zoe) introduced me to the people who saved my fucking life. And Mom's response was THAT? Fuck that. Why is her 'spirit animal turtle' better than three words? Why does her symbol of self expression mean more than Zoe's?

(To top it all off, my mother has gotten her bellybutton pierced at some point, and the only reason she took it out was because there was some sort of problem with it. That's right, she got her BELLYBUTTON pierced.)

And I probably wouldn't have lost it so much if she wasn't like that TO ALL MY FRIENDS. Which is why, in HS, no one wanted to come over to my house. When you're face with hate everyday at school, you don't want to hang out at a place where it's obvious someone is judging you. Mom likes to think that she's this liberal and accepting person just because she's ~bisexual and lived with a woman for seven years, but she turns her nose up at everyone who doesn't fit into a box. Even now, if I try to wear my fox hat (NOT made of fox, but an orange hat with ears) anywhere near her, she'll refuse to be seen with me in public. Because what random ass people we don't know really fucking matter.

(EX: I was telling her about the awesomeness that is Misha Collins life, and I got to the bit about he and his wife's recommitment ceremony (which was adorable) and her reaction was 'That's weird and strange and uh'. (For those that don't know, his wife dress in a suit and he dressed in a wedding dress. With makeup.) I didn't even mention that his wife wrote a practical guide to living in a threesome and making it work. So much for your ~bisexual understanding, Mom. And I say this a bisexual.)

And the thing that makes me RAGE is that she DOESN'T KNOW ZOE. Because she doesn't want to. Because she sees Zoe's hair and her jewelry and the fact that she doesn't care about what other people think, and she has a DO NOT WANT reaction that makes me what to hit something. Zoe SAVED MY LIFE by being there for me. Zoe defended me against people who wanted to hurt me. Zoe was there when I needed her. Mom? Nope.

My stepfather tells me repeatedly for years that I'm a horrible human being incapable of feeling love? She does nothing. Zoe? Holds me when I cry for two hours straight every few weeks.

I have a panic attack because there are just too many damn people around me and I can't fucking breath? Mom tells me to get over it because she can't see what the problem is. Zoe? Tells everyone to fuck off and makes sure that there's always someone I know next to me so that I have someone to clutch at.

Stepfather punches a hole in my wall because I didn't fold his pants right? Mom asks me 'Why do you have to make him so angry?' Zoe? Offers me a place to stay.

And my mother wondered why I got emotional when she called Zoe a freak. Zoe may not care, but I can't stand to see someone who's done THAT MUCH for me completely dismissed by someone who doesn't know her and makes it clear that she doesn't WANT to know her.

I wonder how Mom is going to react when I get flectere si nequeo superos, achaeronta movebo (translates as If I cannot move Heaven, I will raise Hell) tattooed on my back.